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General
Raven Mercer, a.k.a "Jack of All Cards", is a male Lalafell of Plainsfolk clan, registered in the database on with 36401291 for ID.
Born on 23rd Sun of the 2nd Umbral Moon under protection of Menphina, the Lover.
Currently is resident of Ul'dah, Thanalan on Raiden of Light.
Has also been seen on
and Phoenix of Light.
Reached rank of Serpent Captain in Order of the Twin Adder Grand company.
Last interview was conducted on .
This is what adventurer had to say during it:
Tell Brayflox who you swing whacksticks for?
Psssh koh! Glib answer Uplander tongueflaps make. Do they tell me they believe in Eorzea? Eorzea's clickbonds are forged of liemakes. Its city-states are snapclinked together with deceit. And its faith is a contraption of falsemakes.
It is naught but a cobweb of slandertongue. If uplander believes in Eorzea, then uplander believes in thing of not. In Eorzea, the beast tribes often make calltalks of gods to swingboom foemakes--though uplander's comrades raremake response. Gobbie thinks is strange, is it not?
Are the "Twelve" otherwise engaged? Psssh koh! Gobbie makethink they were protectors of uplander. If you truly believe them your shieldbrings, why does uplander not makesame the actplay of winbring so well at Carteneau, and calltalks their arrival? Biglights will answer--so long as uplander brings lavish of jinglyshines with crystals and gorge them on aether. Your gods are no different than those of the beasts--eikons every one. Accept but this, and uplander eyeflaps will sight of how Eorzea's faith causes bloodloss of land.
Brains of uplander's masters of make no ignorance of such. Which brings thinkmakes: Why do they tightcling to these idolfakes? What movebrings even educated uplanders--even the great Louisoix--to groundweep at their ankleswings? The answer? Masters of uplanders lack flexmass to do otherwise! For the world of man to mean anything, man must own liverocks. To this end, he make juncturefrights ever to raise himself through fightmakes--to make many jingleyshinies through venturetake. And when windsand of battle makes stoplong, is it ever the boomflex among uplanders who make tongueflaps of command to controll weaklings.
Psssh koh, brainthinks this, but a single trotwalk is open to impotent masterlander--that of false godsings. A trotwalk which leads to doom! Gobbie boom! Only uplander bigflexes can rightly wellmakes social lands of uplander friends. And in homeplace of creepstalk mandacity, single truespeaks of tongueflaps will prove its salvation.
Psssh koh! Approach, champion of Eorzea, Brayflox Alltalks challengemakes uplander friends! Lossbring of thee shall be proofmake of gobbie's readiness to rule! It is only right that I claimtake take realm of uplander home. For among weak wickedbringers, none such has no boomflops to stop me!